February 2009


Where did February go?

Things are ok.  Pretty good all things considered, I guess. 

About six months ago or so, mr. jolt’s mom decided she wanted to give us a big thank you (we supported her by paying her rent for about 7 years while she was trying to sell a patent (which she did hurrah, only she had so little time to enjoy it – less than 9 months – it is monstrously unfair)) and take us all to Disney.   We were on the verge of canceling the trip & trying again around Thanksgiving because of the ups and downs even though she had told us to go ahead and go because we didn’t want to be there if things suddenly went south.  As it turned out, things went south about three weeks before we were supposed to go and when the dust settled we decided that it would be too cruel  to the boys to lose both a grandmother and a Disney trip all in one month.  So we went.  And it was fun. The best part was that we were away from the boxes of documents we collected from her apartment; away from the bills being forwarded to us that we can only collect and sit on for the moment, away from the 1001 things that need to be done.

V-day, mr. jolt & I spent cleaning out her apartment, only we couldn’t finish and I have to find a way to go back up & find some movers that can take on a small job on short notice b/c we’d like to be out of there by the end of this month or shortly thereafter.  It’s a third floor walk-up and we don’t want to try moving heavy furniture by ourselves. 

But this past weekend we did three days of Disney: Magic Kingdom, Animal Kingdom (followed by Cirque de Soleil (OMFG fabulous if you have never seen them you MUST seize the next opportunity- it costs the earth but do it anyway)), then Epcot.  A phenomenal weekend that was absolutely exhausting.  We need another vacation to recover.

The next few weeks are likely to be spotty due to travel to finish with the immediate dealing with my MIL’s affairs – including the service.  Her side of the family isn’t particularly anything so they tend to cremate and then have a service/gathering of family in a less frantic fashion than most, but it means we still haven’t had the memorial service (which I worry about b/c I think the boys would find it useful for closure) so we  have that before us as well.

So this past weekend was a desperately needed and enjoyable interlude and now we are once more running, running, running to catch up.

Mr. jolt’s mom died yesterday.  Fortunately, it was peaceful and he and one of her sisters was with her.  We didn’t get the boys there, in part because it’s a seven hour drive each way.  If we had any other family to be with in the area, we might have all gone up, but 14 + hours in the car combined with a 5-10 minute ICU visit & camping out a hotel didn’t seem like a great idea.

 

So far the boys seem to be taking it okay, although it was really difficult for me to tell them. I had some good books on hand, one a recommendation of a friend; the others I found in the bookstore when looking for the other one.  In the event you are faced with a similarly sad situation, I recommend “I Miss You” – a very factual explanation of what death is, what people tend to do after a loved one dies, etc.  I particularly liked it because it doesn’t refer to heaven or God specifically, but rather has a more generic approach, i.e., that people have many beliefs about what happen, many of which involve the special part of that person joining with the special parts of other people who have died. (I’m not paraphrasing well, but it’s nice).   Anyway, the other two books are “The Waterbugs & Dragonflies”, which is a nice parable that explains why nobody knows what happens after death, and Freddie the Leaf, which talks about the circle of life. 

 

I will probably not be blogging until next week.