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October 29th is Write to Marry Day.*

I grew up in California, well, mostly.  I left California for college and never really went back aside from a couple of summers.  I met and fell in love with a wonderful person who was tied to the East Coast, and was blessed enough that law and society not only permitted me to love and live with this person, but actively encouraged me to signify my commitment to him, and him to me, by marriage, upheld by the state, and granted benefits in accordance thereto.

If we are going to grant benefits to couples, be it health insurance or pension beneficiaries, tax cuts, etc., then those benefits should be available to any couple willing to sign a marriage certificate.  The idea that the state would uphold one type of relationship over another is inherently unfair and the idea of ‘civil unions’ is another way to say that people who fall in love with the same sex should be treated differently, which any person familiar with the evils of separate but equal should understand is NOT equal.  

My favorite uncle lives in California has been in a loving partnership for over 20 years.  He and my uncle-by-love have thought about getting married, but are waiting to see what happens with Prop 8 for fear that the marriages that have been performed since earlier this year for same sex couples might be invalidated.  If you saw these two, you would see the funniest, sweetest couple, with all the same ‘i’ve known you forever’ inside jokes and affection as any other couple you’ve known and loved.  Through my uncle-by-love I have gotten to know a whole other side of my favorite uncle, one he never shared with the family when my grandparents were alive. 

While I haven’t been eligible to vote in California since 1991, I hope that anyone eligible will vote NO on Proposition 8 and allow same sex couples in California to marry and, I hope, spark further marriage equality throughout the states.

When I was pregnant with my second son, my California uncles came to visit and took me out to dinner.  My uncle-by-love, who knew we were expecting a second boy, teased me, “you know it [gayness] is genetic . . .”  My reply, “well, at least then I have a shot at being mother of the bride.”  We all dissolved in laughter, but I was not wholly joking.  I fervently hope that my sons, should they want to get married, can marry whomever they choose, regardless of sex or gender.

Vote No on 8.

 

*ok, I’m a little early, but better that then late.

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As you may have guessed by the dwindling posts, the tone of recent belly-gazing utterances, the random bursts of attempts to discuss topics that are non-self-absorbed, this has been a blog suffering from an existential crisis (assuming I know what that means).

I spent 13 hours in a car last weekend (to and from a 40th bday party) which gave me ample time for reflection: on my goals, my writing, and why the twain have not yet met.  I have often been inspired by NaNoWriMo where people feverishly write novels, of at least 50,000 words or 175 pages in the space of one month.  I’ve often thought them insane for picking November, which is not only a short month at 30 days, but has a major holiday stuck at the end which often entails family obligations.

Starting in the last week of April, I have about 12 weeks of summer in which I will be afforded a writing night – about four hours, after work – before mr. jolt’s crazy fall schedule prevents it once again.  My goal: to do at least the NaNoWriMo goal of 50,000 words in that 12 weeks.  Obviously, I’ll need more than the four hours a week to get there, but I’m hoping the time-pressure will push me to write, even on those nights where I can’t sit down to write until after 9:30. 

I plan to spend the next few weeks fleshing out some stuff in anticipation of the writing bonanza.  So, I will bid you adieu, with hopes of rejoining the world as a blogger in mid-August, full of tales of my writing conquests.    I will be popping in around y’all’s sites, so I won’t be totally absent.  I hope all y’all have a wonderful summer.

Cheers! j0lt

Which is a good thing- thanks Tonks! – distracted by family visits I haven’t posted in a week.  And I’m home with BB today who has a fever-yet he is somehow a ball of energy. 

Here goes:

1. Name something you have in common with all your siblings:
I’m also an only child so, not-applicable!

2. What is the greatest amount of physical pain you have ever endured?
Hmm, close call between pre-epidural on my labor with BB and smashing my thumb in a ladder a few months ago (I’m sure labor was worse, but the thumb is still fresh on my mind).

3. What number of drinks constitutes your limit?
Wine/beer: a lot, especially if I’m eating.  Hard alchohol – 2?

4. Do you fold your underwear?
Into thirds, doesn’t everybody?

5. Have you fired a gun before?
Nope.

6. What was your favorite childhood toy?
My red tricycle.

7. Name a sound that disturbs you?

People cracking their knuckles – ouch!
8. Name something random that you would never do.

Skydive – just, no. 
9. Name a person whose diary you would love to read.
Queen Elizabeth I.

10. Have you ever had the same dream more than once?
Yes.  Always the weird ones that make no sense.

11. Name a song that makes you happy.
I’ll Melt With You by Modern English.

13. If you were in an emergency situation and you had to deliver a baby, could you do it?
Sure.

14. What do you like about being in a committed relationship?
Trust and shared history

15. What do you dislike about being in a committed relationship?
I miss first kisses.

16. Name something you have to do tomorrow:
Go to work.

17. Name a movie you are looking forward to watching:
I’m so out of it.  Um, does it have to be one that has actually been made?

18. Name something you’ve heard about women that tends to be true:

We love.

19. Do you own an iPod?
Yes.  It’s a shuffle with 10 songs on it.  We are lame.

21. Do any of your friends have children?
Yes.

22. What CD is currently in your CD player?
Depends.  car: Elefunk by Black Eyed Peas; house: jazz & kid’s music; van: kink’s greatest hits

23. Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk?
Chocolate, of course.  Preferably with Ovaltine.

29. What movie do you know every line to?
Shrek, Shrek II, Toy Story, Toy Story II (see the theme?  This is not by choice!)

30. Where was your last vacation?
Cape Cod.  Fabulous. 

32. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?
Nope.  Ears are pierced.  Could never decide on a tattoo that I’d want to look at forever.

35. When was the last time you slept on the floor?
  Camping while driving cross-country while in college?

39. Do you watch the news?
Nope, it makes my skin crawl.  Internet and paper and radio.

40. Do you feel alone?
What tonks said – I crave time alone

I tag – Charley Carp & Mscheevious – but only if you want to.

So apparently November is National Blog Posting Month – participants take a pact to post every day.  Not sure why they did it in November with the Thanksgiving holiday- there are plenty of months with no major holidays.  Anyway, I will not be participating this year, although I like the idea in the general sense, because:

1) Are you freakin’ kidding me?  Every day? (I’m too lazy/busy).

2) I’m away for four days for Thanksgiving and the internet access is sketchy where I’m going.

3) I’ve already committed to exercise every day in the month of November and if I tried to do both I would probably not achieve either.  One kickstart goal at  a time, folks.

4) I have trouble even thinking up five items for a Friday Five sometime; if I posted every day I’d probably end up resorting to massive lists of links.

5) I still don’t understand why November.  February or March would be better (unless you get academic spring break)  Weather’s crappy and there’s no really long weekends.  I have the same question about the novel writing month that this also is.  Very envious and admiring of people who do it, but I am simply not in a position to make that level of commitment right now. 

I am overjoyed to report that I have suckered persuaded a fellow expat to join me here in gangly thoughts land for the occasional guest post.  Folks, welcome penelopeQ!

A frequent lurker at many of the blogs I enjoy, she is sympatico, and thus will hopefully share her delightfully dry wit with us on a regular basis.

Over 1000 clicks on my blog since I started it about a month ago. Yippee!  I think 90% of them are the same half dozen people.  But that’s cool.  We know we rock, right?

Anywho, I am comfortable being a teeny, tiny plankton in the sea of intertubes.  No nasty attention (so far), thank goodness.  Just some short conversations with nice people. I hope to have more.

Via tonks,

Here’s the scoop:
Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”I respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better. If I already know you well, expect the questions may be a little more intimate!You WILL update your journal/bloggy thing/whatever with the answers to the questions.You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the post.When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

tonks questions for j0lt:

1) How do you feel about Velveeta?

Mildly horrifed, but not egregiously offended.  I’m not sure I’ve ever had it.  Maybe at someone else’s house, but I never had it growing up (we bought big blocks o’cheddar).  I’ve heard it melts well, but I don’t think I’d sacrifice flavor for it.

2) If you weren’t a lawyer, what would you be doing?

Fantasy: singer/songwriter.  Reality: probably a writer or journalist (or private detective!).  I like learning new things and putting the pieces together.

3) Why is there a 0 where an o should be in j0lt?

j0lt is based on various usernames I used to have and because my name is a fairly common one I would put a zero in to avoid the “username already in use” error message when registering in various places. Also, I thought it was cool.

4) What is your least favorite household chore? Paying bills.  Time-consuming (b/c I’m anal about balancing the checkbook first), irritating (why do they have all those stupid flyers in with the bill), frustrating (dammit, why do I have all these forms), and stressful (we spent how much-yikes).  Ugh.

5) Would you ever let your boys have a non-mammalian, non-fish animal for a pet (i.e. snake, lizard, tarantula, hissing cockroach, etc.)?
a. If no, why not?
b. If yes, what animal would
you prefer?

Um. Probably not.  We have a fish and 2 cats (actually only one of the cats is ours, more on that some other time).  I definitely wouldn’t let anything like a snake in the house that you have to feed other live things.  If pressed, I could see giving in to pleas for a turtle or lizard, maybe.  I just don’t like the idea of having to clean up after something that isn’t soft and cuddly.   Friends keep asking when we will get a dog.  My answer: definitely not before everyone currently in the house is house-broken. (potty-training for LB is going very slowly and BB took forever)  And perhaps never – cats you can leave for a weekend, dogs you can’t.  But both boys really want a dog (and mr. jolt does too) so I will probably be talked into it at some point.

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